Children attend sea burials more often than families expect, and many families who initially planned to leave children ashore later describe bringing them as one of the most meaningful decisions of the day. Children are more capable of holding ceremony than adults sometimes give them credit for.
Direct language tends to serve children better than metaphor-heavy alternatives. "We're going to take Grandma's ashes out to the ocean and let them go into the water. You can throw flowers in too, if you want. We'll all be together on the boat." Children respond to concrete detail — the boat, the water, the flowers — and to the knowledge that they will be with the people they trust.
Avoid language that makes the ocean frightening, or that implies the person has gone somewhere inaccessible. Many families tell younger children: "This is where [name] will rest. We can look at the ocean anytime and know."
Children who have something to do handle the ceremony better than children who are expected to stand still and observe. Consider bringing a flower for each child to hold until the release. Let them decide whether to throw it. Children who contribute to the ceremony often speak about it for years afterward in terms of what they did, not what they witnessed.
Tears are normal, and children seeing adults cry are not harmed by it. What distresses children is unexplained distress — adults crying without acknowledgment. "We're sad because we miss her, and this is a good place to feel that" is enough.
Many families report that the GPS coordinates certificate becomes an important document for children — a place they can point to on a map, a location with a name. The ocean is not abstract when it has coordinates. For children, having a specific place often matters more than it does for adults.