A calm guide to sailing back to the release coordinates on an anniversary or birthday, what the sail looks like, and when paperwork applies again.
A year after a burial at sea, some families want to go back. They do not mean the marina or a bench on the shore. They mean the place on the water where the ashes were released. Other families choose a birthday, a wedding anniversary or another date that belonged to the person they lost. The release was recorded with GPS coordinates, so that place can be found again, and the return can be planned with the same care as the first sail.
This guide covers what a return sail to the coordinates looks like aboard JADA with Burials at Sea San Diego, what families tend to bring, and when permits and reporting apply. For the wider experience of the first year, see The First Anniversary After a Burial at Sea.
The ocean has no headstone. The coordinates on the certificate of release are the closest thing to an address, and a return sail gives a hard date somewhere to go. Some families find that the first anniversary at home feels unfinished, and that being on the water again lets them mark it properly. Others want to bring someone who could not attend the first time. Whether to go back, and how often, is a choice for each family. No answer is the right one.
A return visit is usually a shorter private sail than the original ceremony. Guests meet the crew at the Sheraton San Diego Hotel & Marina, 1380 Harbor Island Drive, 30 minutes before departure, as they did the first time. Hotel self-parking is available, and the crew has a voucher that lowers the rate.
The water itself has moved on since the release. The coordinates mark the place, and families often say that is enough. More on this is in Returning to the Sea: Visiting the Coordinates Later and The GPS Coordinates Certificate: What It Is and What Families Do With It.
Flowers, petals and wreaths are welcome if they are biodegradable, with no wire and no plastic. The EPA rule for burial at sea allows flowers and wreaths only if they are made of materials that readily decompose in the marine environment. Flowers for a Burial at Sea covers which ones suit the water.
Some families repeat the reading from the first ceremony. Others choose something new that reflects the year since. Readings for a Burial at Sea has ideas. Families may also bring their own music to play on the Bluetooth speakers aboard, and their own food and drink, with no corkage and no minimums. A favorite song, a toast or a shared snack the person loved can mean a great deal in a few quiet minutes.
JADA carries up to 28 guests, so a return sail can be just two people or a wider circle. There are handrails and blankets aboard. A ramp route leads down to the marina level, and there is no elevator, which is worth knowing for older or less mobile guests. If children are coming, it can help to give them something to do, such as placing petals. See Giving Children a Role in a Burial at Sea Ceremony.
Off San Diego, mornings are usually calmest. Afternoon northwest wind builds through spring and summer, and the marine layer often brings overcast mornings, especially in May and June. Winter brings an occasional long-period swell. The National Weather Service San Diego office publishes forecasts at weather.gov/sgx.
An anniversary is a fixed date, but the sea does not always cooperate. The weather call belongs to the captain. If the captain cancels for weather or safety, the family receives a full refund, including the deposit, or a reschedule at no penalty. Some families keep a second date in mind in case the first does not work.
A visit to the coordinates with no scattering does not need a permit. The family is simply going out on the water to remember.
If more remains are to be scattered at the same site, for example a portion kept back from the first ceremony, the rules apply again in full:
These rules can change, so check them before planning a second scattering. What to Do with Remaining Ashes and The Paperwork Timeline explain the steps in more detail.
To plan a visit, call (619) 986-7344 or reserve a date. It helps to have the date in mind, the number of guests and whether any remains will be scattered.
Rules change. Before any sail that includes a scattering, please check the current requirements with the EPA burial at sea page, California Health and Safety Code section 7117 and the San Diego County Vital Records office. We are glad to walk you through it, and if the visit is only to remember, we will simply take you there.